Empty Cereal Box

Views From Inside an Adoptee

July 17, 2006


The overwhleming power of our own need as a human being to be recognized.
To be valued.
To be accepted.
To know who you are and the truth of where you came from, even if it was a dark whirl pool.
The thing I've come to face is that there is no pure truth.
Just perspectives.

- by stillwater heron
a fellow adoptee in a commenting on the crappy behavior of a natural mom toward the child she relinquished.

As someone who fancies herself a writer (of sorts), I find this to be a valuable reminder, especially when it comes to creating fictive characters: To come out of my own whiney-ness long enough to understand other people's points of view. Not necessarily agree with, but understand. This ability to capture character convincingly is tough for me. It's easier to hide under the blanket of my own misery than to follow the course of another human being's development--all the way back to how s/he got to be that way, to unravel the clot of negativity that surrounds her/his behavior and find that the only thing that's different about us is our personal histories. This doesn't excuse crappy behavior, it just shows that human beings often make difficult and wrong choices. And also listen to the wrong advice.


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