Empty Cereal Box

Views From Inside an Adoptee

April 17, 2006

The Stories I Tell Myself

Hello. My name is Marie, and I'm an adoptee. I'm officially a member of blogville's AA: Adoptees Anonymous. Here everyone caught in the adoption machine can connect to talk truthfully about their lives and experiences and grope for some kind of existential sanity.

Yesterday I was about to toss my teabag, when I glimpsed at the slip of paper attached to the end of the string with words that said, "You must first believe in yourself before others will believe in you." I tore the tag off the string and added it to a jar of them next to the stove. I'm not sure why I kept that one, exactly. Guess I thought it just sounded nice. Like a blind person finding a pair of glasses and pocketing them just because it reminds them of what it could be like.

I'm always on the lookout for something that I could belong to (so far, except for the aforementioned AA, the list has nothing on it), or at least could help to explain my behavior, my outlook on life, or all the other things that I chatter about relating to being adopted that cause people to either back away and flee or to roll their eyes in exasperation and quickly change the subject. Sometimes I tell myself that everyone experiences what I do. Last week I found a new categorization to play with in my head. I've seen the term "Indigo Children" tossed around the New Age bandwidths. Wikipedia says that

Indigo children" is a New Age term used to refer to a set of children having certain special psychological and spiritual attributes. The indigo child concept was first publicised by the book The Indigo Children, written by the husband and wife team of Lee Carroll and Jan Tober. Carroll insists that the concept was obtained via conversations with a spiritual entity known as "Kryon". The adjective "indigo" is used because it is claimed these children appear with an indigo-hued aura.
Now, apparently, there's a consensus among Those Who Know About These Things (TWKATT) that there can be Indigo Adults, too. That's wonderful, I tell myself. Now I can belong to a special group of people outside the label of being a special chosen baby. Now I can be a special chosen adult. One of the members of TWKATT says that you can recognize if you are an Indigo Adult if you have all or most of these 27 characteristics, that you:

-Are intelligent, though may not have had top grades.
-Are very creative and enjoy making things.
-Always need to know WHY, especially why they are being asked to do something.
-Had disgust and perhaps loathing for much of the required and repetitious work in school.
-Were rebellious in school in that they refused to do homework and rejected authority of teachers, OR seriously wanted to rebel, but didn't DARE, usually due to parental pressure.
-May have experienced early existential depression and feelings of helplessness. These may have ranged from sadness to utter despair. Suicidal feelings while still in high school or younger are not uncommon in the Indigo Adult.
-Have difficulty in service-oriented jobs. Indigos resist authority and caste system of employment.
-Prefer leadership positions or working alone to team positions.
-Have deep empathy for others, yet an intolerance of stupidity.
-May be extremely emotionally sensitive including crying at the drop of a hat (no shielding) Or may be the opposite and show no expression of emotion (full shielding).
-May have trouble with RAGE.
-Have trouble with systems they consider broken or ineffective, ie. political, educational, medical, and legal.
-Alienation from or anger with politics - feeling your voice won't count and/or that the outcome really doesn't mattter.
-Frustration with or rejection of the traditional American dream - 9-5 career, marriage, 2.5 children, house with white picket fence, etc.
-Anger at rights being taken away, fear and/or fury at "Big Brother watching you."
-Have a burning desire to do something to change and improve the world. May be stymied what to do.
-May have trouble identifying their path.
-Have psychic or spiritual interest appear fairly young - in or before teen years.
-Had few if any Indigo role models. Having had some doesn't mean you're not an indigo, though.
-Have strong intuition.
-Random behavior pattern or mind style - (symptoms of Attention Deficit Disorder). May have trouble focusing on assigned tasks, may jump around in conversations.
-Have had psychic experiences, such as premonitions, seeing angels or ghosts, out of body experiences, hearing voices.
-May be electrically sensitive such as watches not working and street lights going out as you move under them, electrical equipment malfunctioning and lights blowing out.
-May have awareness of other dimensions and parallel realities.
-Sexually are very expressive and inventive OR may reject sexuality in boredom or with intention of achieving higher spiritual connection. May explore alternative types of sexuality.
-Seek meaning to their life and understanding about the world. May seek this through religion or spirituality, spiritual groups and books, self-help groups and books.
-When they find balance they may become very strong, healthy, happy individuals.

We are encouraged to note that anyone could have a few of these traits, but Indigo Adults have most or all of these 27 characteristics.

Gee. I must say I was pleasantly surprised to find that I do in fact belong to this ephemeral group of human beings walking the planet right now. I fit the profile (well, the final characteristic does seem a little problematic).

{Sound of cracking whip}: Back, Marie! Back into your corner, and wipe off the drool.
Duh. Who on the freaking planet wouldn't say they fit this profile? Hmmm. Well, maybe not. Oh yeah, I get it. I meant to say, What adoptee wouldn't say they fit this profile?


Blogger Gwendolyn C. Natusch said...

OMG! Your last bit made me pee my pants! Ur funny! I did the same thing...the oh wow...totally...yeah...that's me...cool...and in the end it's like...so??? and what do I do with this knowledge? Being a special education teacher I have run across the indigo children idea. For me it was a way of rationalizing or giving meaning to why so many children seem to be challenged with ADD or ADHD. The conclusion being made about indigo children was that their frequency was vibrating at a higher rate and so you see different energy patterns being expressed in behavior...Indigo adults...okay...so we are evolving...we are after all energy...and so if the energy increases or moves to a higher frequency I can buy the idea that we might, as a result, have access to other "demensions" or awarenesses actually...and begin to have more access to our emotional selves, intuitive selves etc. Interesting concept though...makes me feel a little like Sybil though...not sure how many indentities I want to have or might have to move through to find my authentic self and have it pieced into one whole identity...

I know for sure I am an adoptee and if I am an indigo adult then...hal-lay-lu-ya...let's get out the tarot cards and throw a party!

Blogger Peter O'Connell said...

Hi Marie, I think that I must be an Indigogo because not only does the list of 27 fit me well but I think that I may have found some more:
Indigogo's have added features such as:
28.They visit the supermarket when their cupboards need filling and the trolley tells then what to buy
29.When they wash their cars they can communicate with the engine and, if they really want to try new sexual experiences...(I won't develop this point)
30.They can blind police radar detectors into thinking that, instead of you, Madonna has just speeded by in a 1964 rusting jallopy
Stand by for more features of being a indigogo person.

Blogger Mia said...

I am far more comfortable with the idea of being an Indigo Adult than just another case of ADHD. Talk about throwing everyone in the same pot!

Diagnosing as ADD and ADHD is totally overused and abused. The term Indigo reflects potentially positive characteristics where ADD and ADHD signifies some sort of flaw.

I fit the Indigo profile but not everyone does. My husband certainly does not.

Blogger Kippa Herring said...

I'm not adopted, but I once had an Indiglo watch.
Does that count?
Or does that extra letter count me out?

Blogger Marie Jarrell said...

Okay everyone. So then, you're saying that this indigo/indigogo/indiglo, whatever, business is just another load? dang. well, okay. so, now what? don't leave me hanging...oh yeah. Hanging. Over nothing. Been there...Still there...

Blogger Kippa Herring said...

Sorry. I just couldn't a-void making that response.
Or that one either.
I just don't know what comes over me.

I have a friend who says she can see auras. Other than that, she's as sane as I am ;-)
She says mine is purple, which is definately not one of my favourite colours.

Blogger HeatherRainbow said...

I totally fit that idea of indigo. The thing is, probably a lot of people would want to fit it. But, maybe it's a thing where we all have the potential to be it, but that our level of awareness either prevents us, or guides us into these abilities.

I am totally working on my other dimensions of healing. For real.

Blogger Annabelle said...

Wow, that list of stuff fits pretty much all the adopted people I know including myself. Thanks for sharing that, it's really cool.


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